Angered by the Affair? Ask the Marriage Maven

Q.

About a year ago, my husband had an affair with someone we both knew. It happened while I was pregnant. He said it would never happen again, but I’m not so sure. She’s still in and out of our
social circles.

I want to try to work things out, but every time I think about it, it makes me sick. The sad thing is that we’ve been married less than three years. Maybe he wasn’t ready to be married. How do we work through our problems and have a happy marriage? Right now, it seems impossible.
P. R.

A.
First off, let me say that I’m sorry that this happened to you.
It’s hard to overcome the powerful feelings that linger after an
affair. But if you think it’s impossible to have a happy
relationship now, that’s exactly what it will be. However, if
you throw away the attitude of the impossible and embrace the one
of determination, having a happy marriage can happen.

You might be right. It is possible (maybe probable) that your
husband did not fully understand what your marriage would
entail before getting into it, but now you both have a
responsibility and that includes raising your child.

It seems like you’re making some good moves. Seeking help from
books and the internet is a great idea. However, I would
suggest that if you are not seeking professional counseling or
coaching now–do it! Go with someone you trust to get you through
this difficult time. Even if you’re the only one doing it at
first, it’s good to get started with a person who can give and
objective approach and help you resolve some issues.

Ultimately, you and your husband will need to determine if
renewing your commitment can work. Each of you will have to make a choice to consciously work at making your relationship better.Both of you will need to make your marriage a priority even above taking care of your child(ren).

Despite what many people think, love is not a feeling, it’s a
decision. I once heard a saying: “Marriage is like a pet snake,
you better feed it every day or bad things will happen.” If your
husband is willing to change, positive action towards making your
marriage better will be evident. That said keep your eyes and
heart open.

About The Author: Keishia Lee-Louis is the Editor and Publisher of MARRIED FOR GOOD .  Her work has appeared on iVillage.com, BibleResourceCenter.com, and in numerous other printed publications. Currently, she is writing a book on marriage and relationships which will be published Spring 2006.

Aloe Vera Properties

aloe vera hairI’ve Heard many times to name the Aloe Vera. The properties of this plant seem to be surprising (in fact, has been used for more than 5 million years). Take Aloe Vera in our life can be a good way to improve our physical health and even see each other better. Here we have a little more about the properties of Aloe Vera.

There are different ways to apply the Aloe Vera. The most common are external, through gels, creams and consumption through syrups or juices. The properties of this product with effects on our skin, in our digestive system and our energy levels.

We can also highlight the anti-aging properties of Aloe. They have the most impact on our health and our appearance. Another benefit of aloe is to help the digestive system function properly and therefore, better absorption of nutrients. Aloe Vera also has detoxifying properties that help cleanse the digestive system and circulatory systems.

Finally, we topical properties. This product is ideal for the first care of burns, cuts and other skin problems as it has a regenerative effect. However, the use of Aloe Vera is not recommended during pregnancy or breast feeding.

Acupuncture Reduce Menstrual Pain

acupunctureWe know that the menstrual period often accompanied by a variety of complaints, especially menstrual pain. According to a study of 27 studies, the researchers stated that acupuncture is effective to overcome menstrual pain complaints.

The researchers noted that there is convincing evidence that acupuncture is effective to overcome stomach cramps due to menstrual symptoms. In addition to more effective, acupuncture was also considered to have fewer side effects than drugs.

Premenstrual syndrome (PMS) is a collection of symptoms, either physical or emotional, experienced by women before menstruation. A common symptom experienced is a joint or muscle pain, abdominal cramps, dizziness, fatigue, to more sensitive or easily upset.

In general, doctors will give painkillers, although some studies indicate long-term side effects on the use of these drugs.

In research done by experts, reviewed 27 studies involving 3000 women. These women perform an alternative method to reduce the symptoms of PMS, including acupuncture.

Acupuncture method basically aims to restore the balance of yin and yang. Technically, the therapist will put a needle into the points on the body, including the “energy lines”.

According to the analysis of the research team, patients who suffer from menstrual pain complaints claiming they were much less pain after acupuncture compared to taking pharmaceutical drugs.

However, the researchers emphasize that there are deficiencies in the methodology of this study, therefore, can not be used as scientific evidence. But in general, they are considered a promising evidence of acupuncture methods.

6 Tips to Save While Eating Rich and Healthy

eating rich and healthy
Are you interested in healthy eating but also care you are interested in the economy of your home? You do well. You can prepare the dishes you like and you like your children and family, achieving your goal. Here in Life and Health’s how.

These days, due to the slow economy, we are all watching our pennies. But when it comes to cooking do not want to sacrifice taste and quality of our food. Follow these tips and save at the supermarket.

– Plan ahead. Prepare the menu for the week and make a shopping list. This will prevent you buy food impulsively do not need. And remember that it is better to go alone.

– Buy in bulk. Good choices are grains, pasta, tomato sauce, nuts and dried fruits. The savings you will see long term, but see!

– Choose generic food. The nutritional value is the same as canned, frozen or bag. Do not waste your little money in the wrong place.

– Do not forget to staple foods. A healthy and nutritious food includes carbohydrates, proteins, healthy fats, and water. Among the carbohydrates: brown rice, sweet potatoes (yams) and oats are good choices and are very cheap. In the group of proteins, eggs, canned fish such as tuna, salmon, and sardines are super healthy and delicious. Also legumes such as lentils, beans (green beans), chickpeas, etc.. are comfortable, good for your heart and are high in fiber, protein, iron and low in calories.

– Get the card from the supermarket. Some cards even give you money in the form of the certificate once you’ve spent a fixed amount. It takes 5 minutes and is free! And do not forget to use coupons.

– Visit the farmers market and buy fruits and vegetables of the season. You see it’s easy to stay healthy and have your budget in order. For example, in the winter buying oranges, apples, kiwis, spinach and broccoli. In the spring: grapes, mangoes, strawberries, watermelon, potatoes (potatoes), and carrots. In the summer, potatoes, tomatoes, avocados (avocados), peaches (peaches). Finally, in the fall: carrots, broccoli, pears, kiwi and melon are good choices.

5 Benefits of a Healthy Lifestyle

This article was written to reach the community with a clear and simple method to demonstrate and to reap the benefits of a healthy lifestyle while reducing the risk of chronic diseases such as diabetes.

With increased understanding of our bodies that we get from science over recent decades, the benefits of a healthy lifestyle become clearer, along with reasons why we have to detoxify the body least once a year to remove harmful bacteria and even worms, from the digestive system of us. For people of all ages, weights, and the ability to benefit from a healthy lifestyle is not limited. But now let’s look at eight simple benefits of a healthy lifestyle.

1. Health:

Good Health is not something you buy from the drugstore or department store but can be achieved by practicing collective behavior patterns related to health, based on choices made from the available options. Following this logic, if you want to realize the benefits of a healthy lifestyle, you must repeat some patterns of sound as part of daily or weekly activities, some patterns such as eating right and exercising.

2. Weight:

Managing your weight is key to achieving all the health benefits of Healthy Lifestyles. Only 10 percent weight loss significantly reduces the risk of heart disease and other diseases associated with obesity.

3. Exercise:

Although drugs alone can often bring cholesterol to normal levels, diet and exercise provide benefits that drugs do not. They will lower blood pressure, lose weight, and reduce the risk of diabetes. A lifestyle is a risk factor for malignancy

4. Medical:

We all want to have a slim and healthy body for a variety of aesthetic, social and medical reasons. healthy living truly the best medicine. In a study conducted by Tufts University in the New England Medical Center, among patients with heart disease, the exercise program was found to significantly reduce LDL cholesterol and other risk factors beyond what is provided by drug therapy. Even modest weight loss can help reduce medical and pharmacy costs, help avoid bariatric surgery, and co-morbidities such as asthma, hypertension, and diabetes.

5. Wellness:

Wellness is about being comfortable in your space: your body, your attitude, and your environment. A very healthy lifestyle can increase the longevity of a person. And although catch something contagious like a cold or flu is sometimes unavoidable, having a sound sense of wisdom better way to live you should be asking yourself why you do not take action to live each day the excess as possible.

25 Tips to Quit Smoking

Stop smoking nowExercise. Playing sports is highly recommended if you decide to quit smoking.

1. Choose a good time to quit. One day you do not have much stress or complicated things. It may be near a holiday.

2. Delayed the time of first cigarette an hour each day.

3. Analyze before you start what cigarettes are more important and why.

4. If you smoke at home is going to limit consumption sites by enabling non-smoking areas.

5. Try to leave gradually increasing time delaying each cigarette, and eliminating several.

6. Avoid circumstances that can cause you the desire to smoke.

7. Wash curtains, sheets, clothes and upholstery of the car to say goodbye snuff environment.

8. Try to exercise every day. For example, a ten-minute walk.

9. The worst part is in the first three days from 5 days the urge to smoke is less intense and more easily overcome.

10. Put posters with the message “No Smoking” at work, at your desk, at home …

11. Do not buy snuff and you have thrown away. 12. Throw out all the ashtrays, lighters and matches.

13. Try to use the time of the cigarette in another activity to keep you busy and distracting.

14. Well ventilated rooms.

15. Avoid stimulants such as coffee drinks, tea or alcohol.

16. If the urge to smoke occurs is very deep breath, relax, drink or chew gum.

17. Take light meals, giving priority to fruit and vegetables in large quantities, which also facilitate the withdrawal will bring you vitamins C and B.

20. You have family or friends to support you in your goal. Comment all you’re going to quit.

21. Remember that all initial discomfort is only temporary.

22. Make a list of your most important reasons for quitting and bring it along for review.

23. Give yourself a small reward for each day’s goals accomplished (a good movie, a book …).

24. Keep rigid habits regarding food.

25. Sleep 8 hours. The rest will help.

What are the CHances? Your Mate’s Cheating Potential

Learn more: power | existing relationship or marriage | new love | health | money | protection | complete set of 5

QUICK ORDER HERE

 power
bless an existing relationship or marriage

create a new love relationship
health
money
protection
complete set

It’s time to prepare for 2006.

That’s right. It’s not too soon to look ahead for clarity and healing. We can create and choose! We have power. Clear out the old, let 2005 go with all its triumphs and failures (hopefully there were few). Ring in the new consciously and spiritually. Let me assist you in designing your New Year. I have selected Feng Shui items combined with affirmations to enhance your ability to create what you want in the New Year 2006. You can order these from me now, all the way up until the end of January 2006.

To get a 10% discount, please order before Christmas.

 

WANT POWER ?

 

Choose this crystal if you want to power up for work and career in 2006. Do you want to start a new business? Power up an exisiting one?

Also choose this crystal if it’s personal power you desire. Are people getting the best of you? Do you get the lion’s share or the crumbs left over?

Make the adjustment you need with this crystal and the affirmation I provide, together with instructions for proper placement and treatment throughout the year ahead.

Cost: $50.00

 

BLESS A MARRIAGE OR EXISTING RELATIONSHIP

 

Choose this crysal is you want to bless a marriage or existing relationship.

Where love and relationships are concerned, never take for granted what you have. Bless and appreciate, that’s the way to hold on to this kind of happiness.

Keep what you have and enhance it with this crystal cure plus instructions on proper placement and treatment with affirmations throughout the year ahead.

Cost: $50.00

 

 

CREATE A NEW LOVE RELATIONSHIP

 

Choose this crystal if you want to bless yourself and draw a new love into your life.

Clear your aura to promote attractiveness.

Remove negativity, past failures, sorrow and grief from relationships that did not work out the way you planned. Make yourself attractive to the right partner!

Use this cure plus the proper placement and affirmative treatments I send you for the year ahead.

Clear out relationship patterns that don’t serve you any longer.

Make this the year happiness finds you at last!

Cost: $50.00

 

RESTORE PERFECT HEALTH

 

Choose this crystal to improve your health … MENTAL, PHYSICAL AND EMOTIONAL.

If you have poor health, you know this is the foundation, the most important thing in life. Without health, nothing else matters.

This crystal cure restores natural balance in the mental, emotional and physical bodies. Give yourself the means to go out and get everything else you want. Works toward healing fatigue, depression, stress related ailments, healing wounds and scars from the past, attends to chronic conditions.

Cost: $50.00

 

 

MONEY

Is it money that seems to have escaped you up until now?

Are you buried in debt, feel discouraged and defeated?

Do you need a new car, a new computer, new monitor, updated wardrobe? Want to be able to give gifts to your friends? Do you want special things for your kids?

When was the last time you took a vacation?

Isn’t it about time to get that turned around?

Let’s get that turned around with the Petite Brass Money Frog cure. It comes with instructions and affirmations for installation during the year.

Get prosperous. Get your head above water financially. Find out what it feels like to be debt free and provide for yourself and others.

If your money’s already good this will keep the good fortune with you by blessing and multiplying principles.

Cost: $25.00

 

 

PROTECTION, REMOVE NEGATIVE ENERGY FROM SELF AND HOME

 

Choose this cure for protection.

Have you had bad luck this year? Can’t seem to get ahead. Can’t hold on to things? Inexplicable losses or failures?

Did someone else get something you were sure would be yours?

This cure will clear all that up. It will bless and protect you, your personal space and your home.

If your luck and personal power have been fine, guard these treasures with awareness and choose this cure to enhance your well being and blessings this year.

Get, keep and bless what is yours.

Cost: $50.00

 

_ + _ + _ + _ + _ + _ + _ + * GET THE COMPLETE SET!

 

COVER ALL BASES for just $150 (save $75)

Why not cover all the bases and get the complete set for a savings of $75 at just $150.

Get an additional 10% off if you order before Christmas.

Complete set includes , MONEY, HEALTH, WORK (PERSONAL POWER) and PROTECTION plus LOVE (CHOOSE BETWEEN EXISTING RELATIONSHIP OR CREATE A NEW ONE).

FIVE IN ALL

 

GET THESE FOUR CURES …

MONEY, HEALTH, POWER and PROTECTION …

THEN CHOOSE ONE OF THESE FOR RELATIONSHIP …

TO BLESS AN EXISTING RELATIONSHIP

OR

TO CREATE A NEW LOVE IN YOUR LIFE AND BLESS THE BEGINNING

FIVE CRYSTAL CURES IN ALL! MONEY, HEALTH, POWER, PROTECTION AND LOVE!

EMAIL ME for more information. Use paypal links or send your payment through www.paypal.com to [email protected] indicating the cure or cures you want or choose the COMPLETE SET and get the best year possible.

Order before Christmas to get 10% discount.

Cures can be ordered and installed all the way through January 2006.

BUT THE COMPLETE SET

 

Don’t forget your Holiday Reading as well.

10 Ways to Tell if You Can Trust the Person You’re Dating

lauhingSo you’ve been chatting with someone on the Internet and now you’re going to meet in person. You’re remembering how the chainsaw murderer is always described as “a nice, quiet neighbor,” or how that last “hottie” turned out to be married and broke your heart, and you’re wondering how to tell if you can trust them.

INVESTIGATE & GET HELP

It’s smart to take care or yourself. TheCloser is a great resource when you’re dating. They perform discreet investigations, offer resources, articles, advice, products and ebooks; and coaching on how to get over the affair, how to choose the right person for you, help with crafting your online dating profile, relationship and safety tips and more. You can find out whether the person is married, where they’ve lived and with whom, criminal background, sex offenses, bankruptcy and so forth, so why not? It’s worth the money. (You can also use this for the workplace, for instance, to find out if the person you’re about to hire has sued former employers.)

OBSERVE NONVERBAL BEHAVIORS

When you’re with the person, observe their nonverbal behavior. We communicate 90% of any message nonverbally – through gestures, expressions, posture, the tone of voice, etc. If what they’re saying (“I’m single”) doesn’t jibe with their nonverbal (“I’m guilty”), go with the nonverbal.

The reason it’s such a giveaway is a lot of our nonverbal behavior isn’t under our control –- the widening of our pupils, the Adam’s apple jump in men, even a case of the hives – there’s nothing we can consciously do about it.

THE GUT FEELING

Many of these nonverbals (like the Adam’s Apple Jump) are muscular contractions originating unconsciously from the vagus nerve, ( ) the longest cranial nerve in the body that runs from our brains to our gut (intestines). It’s the origin of the term “gut feelings,” and why the gut is called “the second brain.” If you’re nervous before giving a speech, for instance, you might get a pounding headache, or you might throw up. It’s also why medications like anti-depressants (acting on the brain) cause side-effects like diarrhea or constipation acting on the intestines).

TEN SIGNS THEY’RE LYING

  • Eye Rubbing. When someone strikes their eye with a forefinger, it indicates deception. They can’t “look you straight in the eye.”
  • Averting the eyes. If they can’t maintain eye contact, it’s usually a sure sign of deceit, guilt or lying. A hard stare is also a bad sign – intimidation, coldness. It can be a sign the person’s prone to physical violence.
  • Touching the nose. As well as indicating possible cocaine usage, stroking or touching the nose is a desire to cover their mouth once removed and indicates deception. Watch out.
  • Finger Motion, Hands Hidden from Sight. You can’t trust this person is really interested in you. The hands are mimicking the desire to run away. Hands hidden is sly and secretive, meaning they don’t want to touch you or communicate with you.
  • The Neck Area. If they scratch their neck just under the ear, with the forefinger they’re probably lying. When someone lies, their body temperature rises, so they may reach up to loosen their collar. With men, it can also be related to the Adam’s Apple jump, which signifies anxiety, embarrassment, and fear. (present in women, too, but not as noticeable)
  • Closed Fist. This means the person has something to hide, just as an open palm shows and open, honest attitude.
  • Hand Gestures. Liars don’t generally have a lot of hand gestures tied to speech patterns, but according to one expert, they will scratch – usually five times in a row.
  • Stoney Face, “Hidden”. Expert liars have learned to control a lot of the “giveaways” like expansion and contraction of the pupils. So have lawyers before the jury, therapists with clients, and poker players at the table, so some of it can be learned. But a good guy or gal who’s interested in you will want to reveal themselves to you. If they look like they’ve got on a mask, they probably do. Wonder why.
  • Voice. When someone lies, the pitch goes up. They may also pause “too long” to answer an “innocent” questions. Talking too much or too fast may be an indication of guilt.
  • Trust Your Gut. Dating is stressful in itself, especially if you’re really interested in the other person. But trust your gut. Check in with how they’re making YOU feel.

There’s one time when even experts misread people. A very honest, sincere person who’s asked something like, “Did you steal office supplies?” or “Are you lying about being single?” may show a lot of agitation, mimicking some of the above-signs. They’re often over-anxious, and are very upset at having been “accused.”

CHANGE

Watch for a big switch when a certain topic comes up. A woman who’s cheating on her husband, for instance, may be chatting easily with you, and then you ask her why there’s a line on her fourth finger, left hand, or why you can’t pick her up at her house next time, and she suddenly:

  • Shifts dramatically in her chair, flipping her head to the side
  • Freezes like a deer in the headlights
  • Clears her throat or coughs, to buy time, or even chokes
  • Looks away, blinks rapidly, covers her mouth, scratches
  • Answers in a way that sounds like a memorized speech, or it too pat

TRUST YOUR GUT

Dating is stressful in itself, especially if you’re really interested in the other person. But trust your gut. Check in with how they’re making YOU feel. A person who’s sincere and anxious should make you feel protective (if you like them) and turned-off or disgusted (if you don’t), but you shouldn’t feel fear. If you feel fear, like the hair stands up on the back of your head, or your palms start to sweat, trust your instincts. That’s what they’re there for, to keep us safe.

EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

Emotional intelligence is the interface between thinking and feeling, and one of the competencies is intuition. When you’re dating, you need to have a lot of EQ! Don’t get swept away by your feelings, and forget to use your head. She might be just another pretty face, and married at that, or worse, a Fatal Attraction looking for a place to happen.